Whatever You Do, Don’t Say ‘Whatever’: via HuffPost http://huff.to/SQWNRf
My fiancee brought this article to my attention today because I am “Ms. Whatever” or “Ms. I don’t care” and this annoys him. If you know me, you already know this fact about me. I’ve probably annoyed you with my indecisiveness.
I will say that the article is correct in saying that this can damage relationships. It has for me in the past, but it is a hard habit to break.
I don’t know why I do it most of the time. I do know that when I say I don’t know, its usually because I really don’t know at that moment. Like if it’s 9am and I am asked what I want for dinner, yeah, I really don’t have a clue. I may not know that until dinnertime. Hence the probably thousands I’ve spent over the years on take out. Boo me.
My mother always took meat out of the freezer the night before and planned the meal for the next day. I never got into that habit.
The ‘whatever’ response I think may be related to my depression, fear of rejection or my lack of self esteem. Maybe its because I’m afraid of my want or need being rejected, or all of the presented choices are fine with me.
Most of the time I am really easy going and really don’t care where I’m going or what I’m doing as long as I enjoy the person I’m with. I have learned over the years how to say no to something I don’t like or someplace I don’t feel like going if I really don’t want to.
I didn’t used to say no and that’s where the issues and resentment came in. I would do whatever the other person wanted all the time and then get mad at them when they didn’t want to do what I wanted or if I really didn’t want to do what they wanted.
I dunno. I am now in self analysis of my ‘whatever, I don’t know-ness’ and I will try to think twice before I say either. Hopefully I can figure out if its just a habit or if it has deeper, darker meaning.
Any other depressives out there have this issue?